random thoughts in a coffee shop

Random thoughts while sitting outside in Jinja, watching boda bodas and people and bicyclists and matatus driving by.

Learning that we don't know when and we don't know how we are leaving the greatest marks on the world and it all matters. The extraordinary things can happen nowhere else but in the everyday.. in the diaper changes and the songs sung and the goodnight kisses. In cleaning the bathroom and hanging the laundry. In talking with the boda driver on our way to town, and waving to the children who yell "Mzungu!" from across the road.

Remding myself that it's not about doing big, great things. But about doing the seemingly small things with big, great love. Because if I "have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains but have not love, I am nothing." (1 Corinthians 13:2)

Realizing how completely unable and weak and broken I am. And remembering, it's not about the gifts in us, but the God who is in us. His Spirit inside us is the only reason He can use us. Humbled and thankful that still He chooses to use us.. even in our weak, broken, sinful state.

Thankful that each and every life is precious in His sight.. for He created us, and we are "fearfully and wonderfully made." And these Ekisa kids. Man, they are extra extra precious.. especially this little guy (in the picture above), Araft. Love him so much!

Life in Uganda is good, so good. There are many moments where I struggle.. feeling I am not doing enough, or doing 'important enough' things, or wondering if anything I'm doing is helping build His kingdom. But God continues to quietly remind me that the simple moments, the mundane tasks, are sometimes the most hardest to do.. and the most important. I feel like this will be a lesson I learn over and over again :) 

Thanks for joining me on this journey and keeping me in your prayers. I have been thinking about home lots, and I'm so thankful for your continued support and encouragement. You guys rock!

faithful healer

* note: the beginning of this update was written this past Monday (September 17th) *

Ekisa has this little boy named Sam. Sam, who is super snuggly and cute and funny. Sam who has the laugh of an old man. Sam whose smile brightens up the entire room. Sam, who sits on the couch with me and listens to John Mayer and Rend Collective. Sam, who played play-dough with me one evening, making everything from Pippin (Ekisa's dog) to boda bodas (Ugandan motorcycles). Sam, who wears pink pajama pants to bed and watched the movie "Up" 2 dozen times in the hospital a few weeks ago.

Sam had surgery on his foot about three weeks ago.. and now he has two crater-sized wounds in his foot that are healing. About 3 days ago we got him off the couch and into a wheelchair, so he could enjoy some outside air. And just yesterday morning he got a new pair of crutches. Very carefully and slowly (and sometimes painfully) he makes his way across the Ekisa house on slightly-too-big-for-him crutches (he's a pretty tiny guy, that Sam).

His foot has to be cleaned twice a day.. a process that takes about 30 minutes each time. No matter where you are in the house, you can hear his heart piercing screams. Hearing a little boy's screams and seeing his tears -from both fear and pain- breaks your heart in an indescribable way, especially when less than an hour before, you laughed and played with that boy and saw his bright, happy smile. For the past week now I've helped with cleaning- either holding Sam's foot or unwrapping gauze and cleaning solutions and things.

Awful is the only word that comes close to describing the whole thing. Completely, totally awful. 30 minutes have never dragged on so long before. It's intense. And while I want to say, "This sucks, and that's that," the words ring in the back of my mind, and I know He's whispering.. a sacrifice of thanks lays down our perspective and raises hands in praise anyway, always. 

And so, while it's awful that Sam endures such fear and pain twice a day.. I am thankful that Ekisa is here, and caring for him. I'm thankful he has a nurse who knows what she's doing and is keeping his foot as healthy and clean as possible. I'm thankful that he has feet, and will hopefully one day be chasing his little friends around the yard on them again. I'm thankful for his tears, because they make the smiles that much more wonderful. I'm thankful that each time we unwrap the bandage, his wounds look better and better (the human body is amazing. God is amazing). 

Thankfulness in difficult times is hard. I don't want to find reasons to be thankful during those times. But how genuine is my thanks when I praise God only when things are going how I want them to? "Blessed be Your name," is so much easier to sing when the world is a right and happy place. But oh, how much more it means when hands can be lifted in praise in the difficult times. I'm not very good at it, at all. Actually I pretty much stink at it. I'm thankless more often than I'm full of thanks.. but I'm trying to work on it.

I wrote the above post about a week ago. This past Thursday and Friday morning, Sam only cried for the first and last 7 minutes of his dressing change, whereas he's usually a mess throughout the entire process. And this morning, we had absolutely no tears during his dressing change! He was actually laughing several times at the movie he was watching, and was playing with "Auntie B" (one of the volunteers here) during the whole thing. It. Was. So. Awesome. 

Updates like this are kind of hard to read, and I thought about not posting it because of that (and because Sam's dressing changes are no longer as intense as when I first wrote this post.. at least, we're praying they won't be anymore) but I want to share with you the way God has been so good and faithful, even in something as small as a little boy's foot dressing changes twice a day. Watching Sam's foot healing physically has been reminding me of how our God is a God who heals us- both inside and out- and I stand thankful.

On a different note.. I just recently found out that Zuena was put on Mt. Olive's prayer chain list. That's so, so sweet :) I wanted to thank you so much for keeping her in your thoughts and prayers! She came home from the hospital yesterday, praise God! It was the sweetest reunion I have ever seen. Rachel (one of Ekisa's kids) was literally screaming and crawling around in excitement upon seeing Zuena get out of the car. haha. The kids all flocked around her, laughing and kissing her. It was so sweet :) Thank you so much for your prayers for this sweet little one! I'm sure you'll be hearing lots more about her now that she's back home at Ekisa. Your support and love not just for me but for these precious kiddos I am serving, really touches my heart.

Here's Sam, on his -slightly-too-big-for-him crutches he just got two days ago. Isn't he handsome? :)

one week at Ekisa

It's officially been a week since I first got to Ekisa! Ekisa is right across the road from an open field, which is absolutely gorgeous to just stand outside and look at. All of Uganda is a beautiful country. It's rained 5 out of the past 8 days. Only two have been heavy downpours, some just light drizzling, and some in-between. But there's almost always thunder. On our walk this afternoon the clouds start rolling in and the thunder started coming. Pretty, right?

The children at Ekisa are precious. Simply, wonderfully precious. There are no words to describe the joy they bring to the Ekisa home. They're all so very different, and although it's taking time, I'm learning the different personalities of the kids. I'm learning that Isaac Little will smile if you rub his face or arms or legs. Paul likes to snuggle, and get your shirt/skirt wet in the process. hah. Debra is super-smart and strong and sassy. 

My days are filled with lots of craziness.. running and playing, digging for toys in the rice buckets (part of school for the kids), feeding. In between all the playing and snuggling, I try to avoid the ants in the bedroom and the rat in the kitchen. haha. And trips to town via boda (more commonly known as motorcycles in the States) happen about twice a week. Right now I'm sitting at the kitchen table, with Paul (one of Ekisa's kids) sitting next to me, wanting to take pictures on my computer. What do you think, isn't he adorable? We had Messy Playtime this afternoon, hence the white flour/water paste all over his face.

Church happens outside in the Pastor's backyard every Sunday. Kids and adults total, there's about 200 people. Lots of mzungus and Ugandans, the Ugandans in the area call it mzungu church. haha. I was surprised at the amount of songs I knew from singing them at church back home. Today the Pastor talked about a lot of things, but one line that stuck out to me the most was this, "Even the most mundane, routine tasks can be an act of worship to God." 

Sometimes it's easy to feel discouraged doing the mundane tasks.. like cleaning, or cooking, or changing diapers (and there's a lot of routine, mundane tasks in my days here). At least for me, in order to feel like I am being used by God, I think I need to be doing something (seemingly) 'big'.. like feeding starving children or giving medicine to a sick baby or telling someone about Jesus. But the reality is that the mundane tasks are equally as important as the big ones. I'm learning this, slowly but surely.

Our days are filled with so much fun and activity, but the moments I'm remembering most are the little ones.. like sitting outside on the porch, singing to Emi (who is sick with malaria) while the rain falls. And chasing Isaac Big around the yard for 20 minutes. I remember hearing Arafat call me Auntie Anna for the first time, and my heart melted. The cries of "Auntie! Auntie! Auntie!" from the moment I walk out of my room until the moment bedroom doors are closed for the night. Hanging laundry on the backyard line with the mamas while birds sing and children scream. Snuggling Debra on the bed last night.

There are moments where I am missing home (like this morning) and don't know how to survive 6 months away from the ones I love so much. But then there are moments where I look around at the beauty of Uganda and the preciousness of these children, and I want to spend my life here. But don't worry, I promise I'll come home :)

Words cannot express how wonderfully blessed I am feeling by you all, and your prayers and your words of encouragement. I say it often, but it really means so much to me. I can't explain it. Know that, while I can't always write you back personally, I am so thankful for your notes and emails and blog comments. You all are so wonderful.

-Auntie Anna :)

day 5 update

It's kind of hard to believe that it's my fifth day here at Ekisa. The days here are long.. not in a bad, boring, dragged-out kind of way. It's more like, our days are filled with so much activity and craziness, at the end of the day you're asking yourself, "Did that really happen just this morning?"

Life at Ekisa is good. Exhausting, draining, hilarious, hard, exciting, good.

The volunteers wake up around 7 each morning (some of the kids wake up at 5:30 a.m!). The children each breakfast on the porch right outside our window with the mamas (the Ugandan women Ekisa has hired) and I don't know who's louder- the mamas or the kids! haha. Needless to say, starting at 6, sleep is a little broken up and unrestful. School starts here around 9 (keep in mind this is all Africa-time though) and all the children participate in the first half. Stations are set up around the house and on the porch and the kids rotate in groups- going to the building/blocks station, the motor-skills station, the sensory room, and then we all meet back together for a story and singing. After an hour(ish), we have snack and then Emily H. and another volunteer do more schooling with the older children, while the younger ones hang out on the porch.

Mealtime isn't exactly the funnest part of the day, especially when you're feeding on the younger ones. Their meal is blended/mushed up, which does not look attractive at all, and I'm sure doesn't taste that great. Somehow, whatever kid I end up feeding is always the last to finish.. Auntie Anna just isn't as good at feeding time as the mamas are I guess :)

The children nap in the afternoon, and so we get a nice 3 hour break to go to town and run errands, or take naps ourselves. Yesterday I rode my first boda (motorcycle) to town. Sara and I rode together (you can fit 2 people on a boda.. unless you're African, then you can fit a whole family. hah) The boda driver told us, "You ride like a man," when we couldn't stay on the boda side-saddle. Needless to say, being a mzungu and 'riding like a man' made me feel like a very silly American girl, and the skirt wasn't helping things either. The Ugandan women can ride sideways while holding baskets of groceries and jugs of water! It's ridiculously impressive.

Little Zuena has been in the hospital since Wednesday, and isn't doing so good. It's been sad and tiring for everyone- especially the Emilys and Ekisa's nurse. She's currently in the hospital ICU, and if you could be praying for that sweet little one, I know your prayers would be greatly appreciated! Ekisa received some good news about one of their boys, Sam, and how his foot is healing after surgery. It was encouraging hear some good news, especially in the face of all the hard news about Zuena.

So, all in all, I'm adjusting to the chaos and craziness at Ekisa.. it's pretty much just like the craziness at home, only African-style. I woke up this morning to find tiny ants inside my toothbrush holder.. which was a bit of a bummer. We have ants in our bedroom, and it seems there's nothing the volunteers can do to get rid of them. So I rinsed my toothbrush, realized life goes on, and got over it. These kiddos are definitely cuties and snugglers, which is awesome.. except it means you catch all their colds. So for the past 2 days, I've had a stuffy nose and sore throat and headache. While it's not been the funnest, if that's my worst complaint, life isn't so bad :)

Plans for the rest of the day include snuggling some little ones after their naps, playing inside/on the porch, possibly taking a trip to the market down the road to buy dinner (if this rain lets up), and showering. I'll write you again in a few days or so, and hopefully will have some pictures of these gosh-darn-adroable kids to share with you by then!

first update in uganda

September 10th

Our flight landed in Entebbe at 7:30 this morning. I wish I could've taken a picture of how absolutely gorgeous Africa is when you're landing during sunrise. Bright red dirt against green land, fog covering parts of Uganda, the red roofs of buildings, the trees.. there's no way to adequately describe the beauty of this place. 

Before getting our visas and baggage (everything made it safely to Uganda, praise God!) Sara and I decided to stop in the bathroom, each taking turns waiting in the hallway to watch the bags. I ended up getting myself locked in the bathroom stall for almost 10 minutes. No joke. Apparently there was no handle on the inside of the stall I chose, and once I closed the door, the only way to open it was from the outside. So there I am, locked in this stall. There was a woman in the bathroom with me, and so I started asking her if she'd open the door for me, explaining I was locked inside. Turns out she didn't know English (this story is just getting greater and greater, yeah?) I'm pulling on the top of the door, pulling on the bottom, trying to get the tiny knob where the other side of the handle should be to turn. I considered crawling out from under the stall, but it was too low to the ground and the only thing worse than being stuck inside a bathroom stall, is being stuck under one. After about 10 minutes of this, a nice security lady opened the door for me, shook her head and smiled at me with pathetic eyes, and walk out. Moral of the story.. check to make sure there's handle on the inside of your stall door before you close it. hah!

Our driver was waiting outside of the airport with his Ekisa logo sign, and thus began the 3 hour drive to Jinja. We drove through Kampala (a drive that deserves a whole blogpost in itself). There is no way to adequately describe the chaos in Kampala. Think downtown Chicago traffic multiplied by about 100- both cars and pedestrians. Oh, and the pedestrians don't cross at crosswalks. And there are no lines to show you lanes for the cars. I think I saw about 3 stop lights. And bicyclists and motorcyclists swerve between stopped vehicles. It was a nightmare. If I ever complain about Chicago traffic again, slap me. 

We got to Ekisa during what I'm told is their most chaotic time of the day- school time. Ekisa has a few kids who go to the local school, but the rest they are teaching here at the home. I'm not exactly sure how it works (I'm really not sure how anything works. hah) but the kids seemed to be having a great time working with the staff and volunteers. We walked with two of the volunteers to pick some of the kiddos up from school, and spent the rest of the afternoon hanging out and trying to remember names and faces. We helped feed some of the kiddos their dinner, and now they're all in their pajamas getting ready to go to sleep. 

These kids are absolutely precious. I was given tons of hugs all throughout the day; they most definitely love to snuggle! I'm not sure how everything works here, but the volunteer who has only been here 2 weeks already seems to have things kinda down, so I'm hoping it won't take long to adjust. But as of right now, I'm feeling a bit confused and overwhelmed. 

There's so much more I could write and tell you about, but I don't know how much/what exactly Ekisa allows their volunteers to put on the internet.. so I've got to ask about that first. And I'm also dead-tired from 30+ hours of traveling, so yeah. Just know that Ekisa is completely awesome and I'll work on more updates (and pictures) when I can!

September 11th (at 1:00 in the afternoon)

I've officially been at Ekisa for 24 hours now. There's a lot to get used to, but this place is so great. My day started (after I woke up and washed my face and got dressed) with about 5 hugs from the kids, the second I walked out of the door. We ate breakfast, and then the kids started school. We went from station to station, doing things like building with blocks, working on colors, Emily has the kids learning their letters (right now, they are on the letter "m") and doing things like that. We spent snack time outside, helping feed some of the kids and talking with the mamas. The staff mamas here really love these kiddos, you can so see it. 

The other volunteers are going to take Sara and I to town within the next day or so, to get set up with internet and money and a phone (whenever we need a ride, we have to call William, the boda driver). It will be nice to have internet in the afternoon/evenings so I can actually post these updates as I type them, instead of saving them to my computer. 

Ekisa has so many kids here- I think there's 20-some. It's going to take me a while to know names and faces and personalities, but I figure I have 6 months, that should be enough time to get it all straight :) We spend mornings with the kids (from 8-noon) and then while the kids have nap time in the afternoon, we have some free time (to go to town, or sleep, or get on the computer). And from 3-7, we do activities with the kids (playing with them, or going on walks, or going to town, or just spending some one-on-one time snuggling them). Being that I don't have a watch, it's been a bit difficult to know what time it is and keep a schedule (I woke up and almost started getting ready for the day because I thought it was 5 a.m. Really though, it was midnight. haha. Needless to say, I went back to bed until the sounds of kids came in through the window in our room).

I'm learning, and adjusting to life here in Uganda. I want to feel settled, and get into a routine, and know how things work (like everything from what's expected of me to do to how to buy things in the market). But I know these things take time.. so I'm trying to be patient :) But it feels like it's been forever since I left Chicago (I guess traveling across the ocean will do that to you), it's hard to believe that less than a week ago, I was in Chicago with you all! 

*later*

Jessica -one of Ekisa's volunteers- brought us into town about an hour or two ago and got us set up with internet sticks and showed us around a bit. The town is about a 10 minute drive away from Ekisa. Usually we will get there by boda (motorcycle), but Jessica can driver Ekisa's car, and since she was going into town anyway, she brought us with. 

Now that I have internet, you will probably be hearing from me a little more regularly. It's loaded monthly, so my updates might not be that often.. since I'm afraid of using it all really fast and having none for the rest of the month! But another volunteer goes into town on Tuesdays and gets coffee and wifi at a restaurant there, so I may end up doing that occasionally if I'm running low on bytes.

This place really is super-awesome. Like, I can't explain it. There are ants on the walls and the shower handle supposedly shocks you unless you hold a towel in your hand while turning it on (I've yet to try this, being that I haven't showered yet. I'll know in about an hour how it goes) and my bed is 2 inches too short for me to sit straight up in (I'm on the bottom of the bunkbed) but none of that really matters, because Uganda is a wonderful place and Ekisa is just so amazing.

And thanks for the blog comments. I may not respond on the blog (or in email all the time) but I will read them all, always, and it's so nice to hear from people back home, especially while I'm adjusting to being here.

I hope you all are doing well. I'll write you another update in a few days, and maybe have some pictures to share with you :)

hello from london!

We're officially in London! Well, supposedly we're 18 miles from the city. When we look outside our window, all we're seeing is open field and a few houses here and there. But, from the little I've seen of London, it's pretty :)

Random Thoughts:

- showers and light switches and toilet flushers in London are slightly confusing (at first)
- airplane food does not smell good when your body thinks it's 2 a.m.
- God watches out for the 'directionally challenged' people. We almost got on the wrong bus outside the airport.. it took us 20 minutes to fine the right one. hah!
- London accents are adorable. I could listen to people here talk all day.
- I'm finding how true Isaiah 26:3 is.

Earlier today, as I was watching flight attendants and business men and mothers with kids and young couple walking around and going about their lives.. I was blown away at how this world is filled with so many people doing so many things. And somehow God is intertwined into the tiniest of details in our every-day. While Chicago sleeps at 2 am, London is filled with the hustle and bustle of people who are starting their day. And God is a part of it all. We all know this, but there are those moments where it really strikes you, you know? And you get a glimpse at how incredible and insane that is. And how awesome our God is, that He chooses to be so involved in our lives the way He is.

I'm 24 hours away from meeting those wonderful Ekisa kids. It's still a bit surreal.. especially being that clean running water and hot showers still exist. The fact that I'm running on 5 hours of broken-up sleep doesn't help either. I had an 8 hour plane ride and lots of downtime on this 12 hour layover to think about home. Which may not have been a good thing :) I'm missing the hugs and smiles from familiar faces, but I know that in less than 24 hours, I'll be getting (and giving) lots of those from some very wonderful kiddos. From the stories I have heard and the pictures I have seen, I think it's safe to say these kids are going to be some of the coolest kids I've ever met :)

Alright, that's all I got for now. I'm not sure how long it will take to get settled in at Ekisa, so you may not hear from me right away. But no news is good news, and I'll write you another update when I can.

time for africa

I'm writing this blogpost with a little over 24 hours left in Chicago. Bittersweet seems to be the best way to describe this moment. To think that the next update you get from me will be sent from Uganda (or possibly London) is a bit surreal, but oh-so exciting!

I don't have the words to thank you all so much for your support. The past 10 months (of planning and preparing) have been humbling and incredible. You all have done so much for me and this trip.. your giving, your praying, your encouragement. I will never be able to adequately thank you. 

Over the past almost-year, I have watched God provide $2,000 in one week. And I have felt His perfect peace in the midst of heartbreak and fears. Ekisa emailed this week, asking if a volunteer would be willing to bring an extra bag filled with supplies, and a check 'just happened' to come in the mail the day before, and covers that cost completely. There's not enough space -or time- to list out all the ways He has been faithful, both in the seemingly big and small. I don't know what God has planned for Uganda. But I do know He has been faithful up until this point, and will continue to be. He is good, so good, no matter what happens or is going on around us. And His constant grace will be enough, always enough.

With about 24 hours left in Chicago, I am nervous for all the unknowns, sad to say goodbye, and excited to think of the adventure ahead. Thank you for coming along on this journey with me, for holding me close in your thoughts and prayers, and for encouraging and supporting me. 

And now, it's time for Africa :)

an update of randomness

International shipping can be quite expensive, but nothing would make me happier than to get a letter from the people back home while I'm away. If you're interested in sending me some snail mail while I'm at Ekisa, the address you want to use is:

Ekisa Ministries
Attn: Anna Bobalik
PO Box 817
Jinja, Uganda

(note: it takes 2 weeks for a letter to get to Uganda, and 2-3 months for a package to get there)

.. Some random details ..

-Travel Scrabble has officially been found and is packed away safely in my duffel. BananaGrams is also tucked in there, safe and sound. Yay for word games!

-the only semi-big thing left on the to-do list is to call the airline and find out some baggage details

-I have 7 lbs of peanut butter packed in my bag (may be addicted to the stuff, it's a debatable matter)

-the volunteers I'm serving with already seem wonderful and incredible

-I haven't packed my carry-on bags yet

-apparently you can buy coconut milk in Uganda

-the Ekisa kids are so adorable (go stalk their website and/or Facebook if you don't believe me)

The countdown is at 2 days. Wildly excited, yet sad and slightly terrified would describe what I'm feeling right now. 

My flight leaves O'Hare at 7:10 p.m. on Saturday.. getting us to London at 3 a.m. US-time (which is 9 a.m. London-time). We will officially land in Entebbe, Uganda at 7:45 a.m. on Monday September 10th (which would make it midnight here in Chicago) but probably won't make it to Ekisa until after noon (it's a 3 hour drive from Entebbe to Jinja). I am thankful to not be making this journey alone, but with a wonderful friend. We're gearing up for an exhausting weekend of traveling, that's for sure. 12 hour layover? Bring it on :) 

I'm finding that preparing for a trip like this is a journey in itself. And actually getting to the destination and serving and living the trip is a whole new kind of journey. And in about 60 hours, that journey will officially begin. 

hand to the plow

Being 4 days away from leaving the country, the question has been on my mind a lot lately.. how does one prepare -mentally, emotionally, spiritually- to leave behind home, family, and familiarity for half a year? I keep waiting for that moment where I know I'm ready, and it just doesn't seem to be coming. I'm (almost) packed, all the details (like an international debit card) are figured out, all of my support money has been raised (our God is an awesome God). Physically speaking, I'm almost ready. But emotionally and mentally? Not so much.

I'm coming to terms with the idea that I will never be completely ready to leave Chicago. I'll never feel mentally prepared for these 6 months. I don't think I'll ever be emotionally ready to say goodbye to my family. And I'll always think there's a few more ways I need to grow spiritually before I leave. I don't think 'feeling ready' is in God's plan for this trip.

The idea of being apart from my family for so long has been a hard thought. Luke 9:62 has been coming to my mind a lot lately. It says, "Jesus replied, "No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God." Right now, it is so easy to look back at everyone and everything I am leaving behind. I've done, and probably will do, more looking behind than I'd like to admit. But in the looking back, I know I'll miss what God is doing in front of me in Uganda. And I don't want to miss out on His plans or the building of His kingdom. I'm learning this Jesus-following stuff is hard and it costs, sometimes very dearly, but He is worth it.

I'm also learning that time passes. Just as quickly as my departure date has come, so will my return date be here. And while 6 months is a long time, the reality is that March 6th will come all too quickly, my feet will be in Chicago again, and my time at Ekisa will be over. And I'll struggle again, to not miss what God is doing in front of me here in Chicago because I'm too busy looking back at my journey to Africa.

I'm expecting some homesick days.. actually lots of them :) So maybe -if you're up for it- occasionally send me an email, or leave me a blog comment, or write me a facebook message (or, if you're feeling super snazzy, some letters via snail mail!) to make the distant seem not quite so vast? I don't know exactly what my internet situation will be like in Uganda, but I'll reply as quickly and often as possible.

You'll probably get one more update on here before I leave the States, but after that, I'll be writing you from Uganda!