packing packing packing

Incase you're wondering what packed for 6 months looks like, here's a quick glimpse :) 

2 pairs of pants, 6 skirts, 3 dresses, 

2 pairs of capris, 5 tank tops, 5 shirts, 1 hoodie,

1 sweater, and 2 long sleeved shirts.

190 malaria pills.

Did you think I'd leave home without them? :)

My dentist has taught me well, I even packed floss. Success!

4 pairs of shoes, yellow gladiator sandals included.

I'm pretty sure I'm forgetting about 500 things.

What the infamous bag looks like at 13 days to go. 

*not included in this post:

-duct tape

-500 buttons and sewing fabric (to bring to a friend)

-sunscreen!

-a ridiculous amount of peanut butter

-mosquito netting

-travel scrabble and banana grams

-everything else I'm forgetting

Anybody ever pack for a 6 month trip overseas before? 'Cause I would love some helpful tips and suggestions right about now...

info on how you can stay updated

Overwhelmed. Exactly 19 days until I am on a plane headed to Uganda, and that's how I'm feeling.. excited and sad, but mostly overwhelmed.

I spent last Monday morning in the doctor's office, getting shots and realizing how head-over-heels in love I am with my travel clinic. I'd marry the place if I could, seriously they're the best :) Wednesday was spent at the eye doctor and on Saturday we stopped at the bank to get information about international visa cards. Basically, in between the normal day craziness, life consists of random errands getting done.

With about 3 weeks left in Chicago, it would be safe to say I feel as though I'm on a bit of an emotional roller coaster. The idea of being in Uganda again fills me with an excitement and joy that's indescribable. But I know that it also means leaving Chicago -and all you wonderful people- behind. And while Uganda has had a special place in my heart since last summer, the idea of being away for so long breaks my heart. I have mornings where I want to cry, and then mornings where I'm ready to pack my bags already.

With the (fairly recent) small ebola outbreak in western Uganda, a few people have been asking me if the trip is still on. I had a few days where I did freak out, but I came to a place where I understood that -long before I was accepted to volunteer at Ekisa- God knew what would be going on in Uganda. While this was something that surprised me, this was something He knew all about. And so, unless God does something crazy like close the country's borders within the next 2 weeks, I will be on a plane headed to Africa. 

I'm feeling all-around inadequate for this journey to Uganda.. worrying that I won't 'have what it takes' to care for children 8 hours a day/6 days a week, or to be away from home for so long, or just for this whole trip in general. But God quietly whispers for me to remember.. there has never been a time when His constant, faithful grace has not been sufficient. He has never failed, so why should I start worrying now? 

Nothing would make me happier -or be more comforting- than to know that you all will be joining me in going back to Uganda.. through blog posts, words of encouragement, and lots of prayers. And so, here are the details on how you can officially follow this adventure and never miss an update.

I will be sending all updates through this blog. Right now, this seems better than trying to mess with lists of email addresses. So you have two options, number one being: you can stalk my facebook profile for the next 8 months, as I will be linking all the updates to my profile. Or, number two, you can subscribe via email, and all updates I write will automatically be sent to your inbox. You can find the subscription box on the right hand side of my blog. An email will be sent to your inbox, and you will have to activate your subscription with the link provided, but after that you should be good to go (I would keep an eye out and make sure the updates don't accidentally get sent to your spam, this has happened to a few people once or twice). If you have any problems or questions about staying updated, don't hesitate to shoot me an email! 

If you would like some more specific things to be praying for, another update will come soon, so stay tuned :) Thank you all again for your continued support as I get ready to start this crazy-wonderful journey! 

a very overdue update

With the Africa countdown at 6 weeks and 5 days, I'm finding myself with a little under $2,000 to raise and a whole lotta stuff on the check-list to get done. Thus begins the doctor appointments (malaria meds, anyone?) and trips to random places (like the police department) to get random things (like background checks) done. The plane tickets are bought, and on September 8th at 5:10 pm, I will be on a Uganda-bound plane.

This stage is exciting, but it can easily and quickly become overwhelming. Contrary to what one may believe, the day-to-day reality is not this romantically wild, thrillingly adventurous journey (there are times when it is though). The reality is a trip to the local police department where you find out the only place that does background checks is 20 minutes away.. and they haven't been answering your phone calls all day. You find yourself -at 3:20 in the afternoon- with maybe 3 things checked off the to-do list, overwhelmed and wanting yoga pants and a bowl of chocolate ice cream and a nap.

I have been meaning to write an update for some time now, but it's only recently (as in, the past 2 weeks) that I've started actually doing things to prepare to go. While my lack of updates may make it seem like I take your support for granted, nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, my eyes have never been more opened to all of your support than it has been recently.

Until I went to Uganda last summer, I never realized how important the 'Senders' are in overseas missions. And even then, I didn't realize just how vital they were until I came home. And it seems that recently God has wanted to open my eyes a bit more to how precious and essential you, my sweet supporters, are.

I will never be able to adequately express the depth of my appreciation for you. Every email and facebook message is read (even though the reply is much delayed). Every Uganda trip question is a sweet sound to my ears, because it reminds me that you care. And every "praying for you," whether uttered or written, is highly and dearly cherished.

God blew me away last Sunday when I found out that my church's VBS program raised $937 for my Uganda trip. Little kids came up to me throughout the week with ziplock baggies filled with quarters and pennies and dollar bills. And my heart was instantly humbled, thinking of the pink piggy banks and small hands they came from. Parents came up to me on Friday evening with questions about my trip. And while they didn't know me very well, their hearts were generous and wanting to give. The words 'amazed' and 'humbled' and 'thankful' don't begin to explain how that makes a person feel.

When I think about the hearts God touches through overseas missions, my thoughts usually are on the people going, and the ones they are going to. I forget that God has plans in store for the Senders just as much as anyone else. God has been reminding me that you are the reason overseas missions can happen. You, the Senders, make it possible.. with your prayers, your donations, and your encouraging words.

Basically, without sounding terribly mushy, I want to tell you how awesome you are. And how thankful I am for you.

To give you a simple, basic update:

-the background check is halfway done, my papers need one more trip downtown to get sealed and signed
-the travel clinic is closed until Wednesday, but an appointment will (hopefully) happen within the next 2 weeks. Hooray for more vaccines!
-an internet stick and international cellphone need to get looked into and figured out (translation: more random errands).
-the ear pain I've had since December was officially diagnosed as TMJ/ allergies/ possible teeth problems.. while we're worried that all the flying may stir things up more, we're so thankful to have a better idea of what's going on.
-the plane tickets were officially bought 2 weeks ago. So exciting! Our departure date is September 8th and our return flight lands in Chicago on Saturday April 27th.
-the idea of being gone in 2 months is something I still can't wrap my head around. While I can't imagine being gone for 8 months, the more I read about Ekisa and talk with the volunteers I'll be serving with, the more anxious I am for these 8 months.

The next month will be packed with errands and things to get done before I leave, but hopefully summer-y things.. like bonfires and swimming days and dance parties and get-togethers with friends.. will be happening also. It's easy to be crushed with sadness at the thought of saying goodbye to the most important people in my life, and to things like high-speed internet and cheese pizza and American church services (just keeping it real).

Depending on how you look at it, it seems like a lot of goodbyes and last's and heartbreaking. But it can also look like a many first's and learning lots of things and embarking on a crazy, exciting adventure and meeting some oh-so-spectacular kids. While I'm anticipating many days of homesickness and days of counting the cost of following Jesus and feeling that sacrifice, I'm just as expectant for the days of utter joy, and a heart overflowing with His goodness and love, and the closeness to a Savior that comes when one does something completely crazy and out-of-this-world.

Another blogpost will be written soon.. with more information on what's happening, and also with details about how you can stay updated on the things God will be doing in Uganda!

one year later

A year ago today, I was on a plane, headed for Atlanta, Georgia. I went to bed late, and woke up early, the excitement and fear running sky-high. I was about begin the craziest, most God-filled adventure of my life thus far. I had no idea how those short 4 weeks would change my life, leading me to make the decision to spend 8 months in Uganda this year. (I mean really, did anyone see that coming?)

One year later is a lot of things -sad, slightly mind-blowing, hard to believe, odd, bittersweet. Because, you see, I never really thought this day would come. Somehow, I imagined I would go to Uganda and not come home, that the journey wouldn't end. I didn't think about 1 week after the trip, much less one year.

A year ago tonight, I would climb up three stacks of bunkbeds and try not to think about the dead bees that were at the window by my feet. Letters from home would fall out of my bag, and I would be overwhelmed with an intense feeling of homesickness. Excitement, fear, and sadness would be racing through me because this was it, the journey was about to begin.

But tonight, one year later, will be just like any other night. The house will get cleaned, dinner will be cooked, and I will go babysit. I won't wake up -greasy hair and unwashed face- and head off for an exciting day of getting to know my teammates and preparing to be in Uganda. I will wake up and head off to church, and do normal-life things.

Am I sad, thinking back to one year ago? Yes. Dates don't usually mean much to me, and I didn't think June 16th would, but it does. One year later, it hits me hard: this is over. I know the journey has been over since the moment I walked off that plane and stepped foot into my own home. But I suppose it didn't seem official until today, one year later. Do I wish I could go back to one year ago? The answer to that would be yes and no.

I miss Uganda, and my teammates, and the adventure that those 4 weeks were. And there are days where I would love to go back to that time. But I have seen God do so much in one year. He has led me (and my sweet friend) to serve at this amazing place for 6 months. He has taught me so much -about His heart, about grace, about following Him, about my selfishness and pridefulness, about His faithfulness,  about His unending love and mercy. He has worked out significantly small (yet, to me, seemingly large and important) details of this trip. I have watched Him provide $2,000 in one week (one. week.) for my upcoming trip to Uganda. He has done so much in one year. And I am forever thankful to be a part of it.

In twelve weeks, I will set out on another crazy, God-filled adventure back to Uganda. And there will be so many stories, and laughs, and tears to share with you. And when that chapter ends (because, although 6 months seems like forever, it will eventually come to an end) there will be more stories of His love and faithfulness, and the watching of His hand moving in mighty ways that will be weaved into my life.

I hope for a lot of different things, but my biggest hope is that my life will be a testimony to the goodness and faithfulness of the Lord. And that means many things.. one being that adventures will end. But not without new and different -yet just as exciting- ones beginning (isn't the grandest adventure of all discovering more of His heart and love?) and not without many stories that testify to how awesome and faithful our God is.

great is Thy faithfulness

"I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember Your miracles of long ago. I will meditate on all Your works, and consider all Your mighty deeds. Your ways, O God, are holy. What god is so great as our God?"
-Psalm 77:11-13

I am going back to Africa. I am finally typing the sentence my fingers have longed to type since July, the sentence I never thought I'd ever write or speak. But it is official, and it is real: I am going back to Uganda.

It would be impossible to explain the many thoughts and emotions that play through my head and my heart.  I am oh-so excited. I am oh-so scared. I am oh-so ready to pack a bag and board a plane. I am oh-so heartbroken when I think of saying goodbye to Chicago and my beloved family for 8 months. I am completely overwhelmed.

The process of getting to this place of returning to Uganda has not been easy by any means at all. My mind replays the countless nights of crying out to the Lord, "What is Your will?" The rejection, the searching, the surrender. So many thoughts were worked through, so many places applied to, so much surrender had (and still has) to be done. This journey has not been easy, and this journey has only just begun.

Sara and I have been praying about going back to Uganda since August. And oh, to tell you all He has brought us through! It would take many a blogpost. We considered so many options, we applied to so many places, we prayed over so many things. It got to a point where we had to stop. In the midst of trying to get back to Uganda, I had forgotten who was really in control. I had foolishly believed it all depended on me, when really I had no control whatsoever.

I have been reminded of this again and again: I can accomplish nothing. Each moment, each breath, I have to depend on Him. There is no other way. And it seems that, as soon as I lose that mentality and focus, He does something to bring me back to that place of dependency.

Going back to Uganda for 8 months. The commitment I have just made feels dauntingly and scarily and overwhelmingly huge. Honestly, I am freaked out. Leaving behind Chicago, surrendering my family, caring for children with disabilities, living in a completely different culture.. for 8 months. How in the world am I going to do this? And thinking about it now, I have to laugh. Because I have been reminded that I'm not doing any of it, He is.

When I stand in the airport next fall, saying the most heartbreaking goodbye of my life, He will be there. When I worriedly begin to think of home and what may be happening without me, He will be there. When I serve day after day at Ekisa, when I am mentally and physically tired, when I don't know what to do, He will be there. When I learn how to live in Uganda and shop in the market and live in a culture so new to me, He will be there. He will always, always be there.

I look at all that God has brought me through-- just in this process of returning to Uganda, and also within the past year of my life. And I stand amazed. "Look at all He has done!" my soul screams at me, "How can you doubt Him now? How could you forget what He has brought you through, and all He has promised you? How can you worry that He doesn't know best?"

All I have needed His hand has provided. He has worked all things in His perfect timing for His perfect will, always. He has given me, His child, what is best for my life. Great, oh-so great, is His faithfulness. When I look at my past, when I remember and reflect on what He has done, how can I not rest assured that He who has been so faithful before, will be again?

I stand about to embark on this journey, not knowing what may lay ahead. And I hear Him say, "All you have needed, My hands have provided. Child of mine, do not doubt Me now." It is still scary, it is still hard, it is still unknown. But all I have to do is glance behind me, seeing the work of His hand, and this I know: He has taken care of me up to this point, and He's not going to stop now.

no greater joy

"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." --Luke 12:32-34

Meet Waako Elisa, an orphaned child that lives in Uganda. He was able to receive a shirt and shorts because of your loving kindness and generous hearts.

This little girl's name is Kataike Shabila. And she also was able to have a new skirt and shirt because of your donations.

Her name is Kaanyi Nabutono. And she is another orphaned child living in Uganda who received a shirt and skirt that were in the boxes sent to Africa.

This is Naula Helen, whose father died of AIDS. She was able to receive a shirt and skirt. And yes, for all you VBS goers, that's a High Seas Expedition shirt she's wearing.

This is Kabasa Margaret, and that is her mother in the background there. As the Ugandans say, she looks quite smart (nice) in her new clothes, doesn't she?

This orphaned boy -Ndoboli Jackson- also received a new shirt that was in the boxes. This photo makes all the Fedex telephone conversations above and beyond worth it.

I am more thankful for your donations than I could ever begin to express. And I am humbled by those of you who have asked how you can help. If you would like to get involved, you can donate items to send (skirts and dresses for girls, shirts for both boys and girls, boy's shorts, gently used or new shoes for girls and boys, soccer balls, jumping ropes) or you can donate money for the shipping cost of the boxes (even with the God-given discount I have through my cousin, this can become costly). As God continues to provide, so we will continue to give. Shoot me an email or facebook message for more details.

We are storing treasures in heaven, where thieves do not break in and moths do not destroy. But we are also giving these things hoping that those who receive them will know of His immense love for them. For there is no greater gift and no greater joy than knowing Him.

Thy hand hath provided

"I will sing of the Lord's great love forever; with my mouth I will make Your faithfulness known through all generations." -Psalm 89:1